ABSTINENCE-ONLY?! Sex Education USA vs. Germany | German Girl in America

S: It was like don’t have sex for marriage… N:They had a pregnancy class for the girls who were pregnant… G:We would literally look at pictures of diseased genitalia… Hallo, Servus and welcome back to my youtube channel. My name is Felicia, I’m originally from Munich Germany, but I have been living in Cincinnati, Ohio for about 3 years now. Those of you who have seen my video on dating differences already kind of know what today’s video is going to be all about because I touched on that topic in that video, too and I may repeat some of the things I said then but this video is actually going to be a lot more in-depth and that’s also why it’ll be a lot longer than my videos usually are. If you’d like to skip parts off the video, feel free to do so with the time codes that I put in the description box below. Before we dive into this, I’d like to say that I am aware that this is a very sensitive topic and it’s important for me to stress that I am not trying to offend anybody with this video but, even though I’m going to try and keep it as objective as possible, I do have an opinion on this topic that I probably won’t be able to hide. I’d also like to say that I respect all opinions and I do encourage a civilized discussion and exchange of experiences in the comments below but no insults please. I’ve decided to make this video because it’s interesting to me how two countries like Germany and the U.S that have pretty similar backgrounds at first sight like the same form of government a similar culture and even the same predominant religion approach certain aspects of life so differently and in regard to some topics I think that Germany and the U.S could actually learn from each other. In other aspects, that may just be interesting to compare and discuss the reasons for the differences. So this is going to be a look at the sex education culture in the U.S from the perspective of a German millennial who went to high school and college in a big city in Germany and who was honestly kind of shocked to find out what kind of things some of my American friends were taught in the sex education classes here in the U.S and I actually interviewed some of them on camera. So you’ll hear some of their experiences later in this video. Let me start with what I was used to from growing up in Germany and what I thought was normal. So school curriculums vary within Germany but sex education is a mandatory part of curriculums nationwide and has been for several decades In former East Germany, they made it mandatory in 1947 and in West Germany, they published a coherent course book on sex education in 1969 and they made it a governmental duty by law in 1992. Historically, the first state-sponsored sex education courses in Germany were introduced really early in the year 1900 in Prussia. So this was when Germany was still the German Empire So since sex education is mandatory in Germany, the German Federal Constitutional Courts decided in 2004 that parents can’t opt their kids out of sexual education classes for religious reasons because imparting objective information is neither in conflict with their religious freedom nor with the parents right of education. They also said that it would encourage the formation of a parallel society and the European Court of Human Rights made the same decision in 2011. So I think you can already tell how much weight is given to sex education in German schools and for me growing up in Germany, there was that but then there’s also the fact that Germans in general just tend to talk a lot more openly about sex-related topics. In school, I remember that we had sex education in 5th 6th and 8th grade and in 5th grade, we went on sort of a field trip to a nearby youth centre with external educators and they separated boys and girls and I remember that we learned all about how the menstrual cycle works, how pregnancy works, how to handle our periods when we first get them, how to use tampons and pads and also, what kind of contraception there is for when we will have sex for the first time some day. We also got a little package with tampons and pads and informational brochure. I think a menstrual cycle calendar and a condom was in there as well. This actually took place in a very comfortable atmosphere, nobody felt embarrassed and I think that the kids actually asked questions and from what I heard the boys learned about the menstrual cycle and pregnancy as well but then they also talked about what they were about to experience getting their first erection and all of that. In sixth grade, we then talked about the reproduction process in biology class but it was mostly just limited to the plain facts and, then in eighth grade, we talked about it again but, that time, it was a little bit more about actually having sex. So we also talked about the different kinds of protection and contraception and how to use them, we talked about S.T.Ds and I believe that we talked about the different resources that we could use if we ever needed support with any of this and we also talked about how abortions work and how an artificial insemination works. The curriculum describes this as providing guidance for a responsible approach to sexuality and honestly, that’s exactly what it felt like to me, nobody tried to scare us and nobody encouraged us to have sex and, in 8th grade alone, the Bavarian curriculum schedules about 10 hours for sex education in biology class Besides school, from what my friends Munich and I experienced, most parents were also very open and supporting and so was a lot of the media targeted towards kids and teens. There’s this kids new show called ‘Logo’ that I used to watch growing up and I remember that they sometimes address the topic of H.I.V and how condoms can protect you from it. For a lot of girls in my generation and previous generations, teen magazines also played a pretty big role and mainly the weekly magazine Bravo that my friends and I started to read when we were like 12 or 13. Besides stories on celebrities and fashion, etc, Bravo always had a few sex related pages as well, the category was called Doctor Sommer and contained two parts one part was a page with a picture of a naked teenage guy and a naked teenage girl. These people volunteer to be in the magazine and there would be some information about their hobbies and what they liked and disliked about their bodies. This was always the most scandalous part of the whole magazine and of course nobody would admit that they had looked at it and it may even sound like crossing a border now that I’m explaining this but looking back, I actually have to say that I feel like it helped a lot to show kids that not all genitalia and bodies look the same and that that’s okay and normal. The other part was actually about sex-related questions that the readers had sent in and that the Doctor Sommer team answered. There were questions like ‘I have trouble using a tampon’, ‘How can I get birth control?’ ‘Does my penis have a normal size?’ ‘I’m 15 and my boyfriend wants to have sex with me, but I’m not sure if I’m ready yet’ or even ‘Can I get pregnant from kissing?’ those kind of questions. Just all kinds of sex-related questions that teens could possibly have in that phase and the answers almost always started with something along the lines of “Don’t do anything you’re not ready for’, ‘It’s important to talk about things with your partner,’ and ‘It’s not a competition’. They would also say things like; ‘You can try different things before actually having sex but make sure to only do things you enjoy and use protection’ and ‘tell your partner if you don’t want to do something’. That magazine has definitely taken on a huge role regarding sex education in Germany in the past few decades and it also represents the overall tone in our country when it comes to that topic. Nobody ever told me or my friends that sex was something bad, instead, we were taught that it’s natural part of life and in my experience that didn’t lead to anyone walking out of sex education class and be like ‘I need to try this right away’. On the contrary, I personally feel like since we knew what to expect and that it’s going to happen anyway at some point, there was no need for people to rush into it or try it out of curiosity and, once people started dating in like 10th 11th or 12th grade, it was actually pretty normal that kids were allowed to stay the night at their girlfriends or their boyfriends place. Of course all parents handled that differently but I feel like overall the communication between parents and kids regarding that topic is pretty mature in Germany and I think I only know of one friend whose parents didn’t allow that. Now when it comes to sex education in school, some of my friends in the U.S have actually made fairly similar experiences to what I just described, especially the ones who went to inner-city schools, but a lot of Americans make very different experiences. Of course things vary from state of state from school to school from family to family but sex education is not mandatory by federal law in the US and only 29 states have made it mandatory and, even in those states, there is no unified curriculum on the topic, only 17 states require it to be medically accurate and the statistics as well as the number of friends who have told me disturbing stories actually shocked me. Sexual education in the U.S is taught in two main forms: which is pretty much what I just described from my experiences in Germany and abstinence-only, which to a lot of Europeans will probably sound really outdated but a lot of students in the U.S are actually taught that the only way of having safe sex is having no sex at all and that they need to wait until marriage to have sex and, in the course of that, a lot of schools hardly educate their students on protection and birth control or don’t educate them on that at all. I’m going to provide some numbers for you guys in a second but first here’s what some of my American friends have told me about their personal experiences: S: I am from Memphis, so the South and my family is very religious. S: So not liberal or like open to talk about things. S: As fo my middle school, I really don’t remember having like a class a specific class like telling us about sex ed at all those like don’t have sex before marriage. S: It’s just like no, it’s like the silent known like ‘Don’t bring it up,’ ‘You don’t do it’ ‘It’s a sin’ Bad, just like slap on the hand, like that’s how it has always been. ‘Do you remember having sex education in high school at all?’ S: Honestly no I don’t think that we had a class that talked about it and, if there was one, I wasn’t in it. S: I knew what a condom was from just like movies and and how to use one but I I didn’t have sex in middle school or like early high school. S: So I never experienced anything with it. So it was more like my friends experimenting and then telling me about it. S: It was more research and then friends telling me it was never through like a parent or a teacher or even a pediatrician. My pediatrician was very ‘Don’t do that ‘you’re too young wait until you’re older and in love and married’. S: I didn’t talk to my mom about birth control until college and it was my freshman year and I told her I had bad cramps and that my periods were irregular and I needed something to help that. S: My grandma had a boyfriend was being intimate with him and I wanted to just like have protection and not have to worry about anything. S: High school clearly people I… I mean I sort of have my boyfriend. So like things would be talked about between me and the boyfriend I never talked to my mom about it. S: I mean my mother never said ‘hey, while you are seeing so and so, make sure dot dot dot’ like that was never talked about. S: I still don’t talk about it and I’ve had serious relationships. S: I’ve lived with people and they had no idea. S: I’ve been intimate and I feel like they know but they just don’t talk about it, or maybe they don’t maybe they’re just so gazed over. S: When it comes to people like staying over. I never had a boyfriend stay over in high school. S: With boyfriends, I was like someone always had to be home. S: So like a parent had to be home at his place at my place doors were not shut. S: I was always downstairs, if we were in my room for some reason the door had to be open all the way. S: In college, I had my boyfriend stay over my freshman year. S: He slept in a different bedroom than I did. We weren’t allowed to like be in the same room with the door closed. We would be in my room, on the bed, watching a movie or something and she called me over and said; ‘Why are you doing that? You’re setting a bad example for your siblings’, which was weird because I was like if it was so casual for us to do it in college and then to come home, you forget how shut off things are. I wish there was just more open communication in schools and with parents and maybe if parents are unsure of like how to talk to their kids like they need to be educated on how to talk to their kids S: I think that’s one thing that I want to do when I do have children, it’s like yes, I am a Christian and I believe that God loves me and I’m going to follow these steps, but also know that, if you have sex before marriage, it’s not the end of the world and I’d much rather you do it protected and safe and be able to tell me, then go about what I’ve done which is like have to live like a secret life almost like what I do and don’t do N: They had a pregnancy class for the girls who were pregnant because there was probably six of them maybe –In your high school?
N: In my high school, yes two in my grade and then probably some in upper class that I would see obviously because of their belly. N: So in middle school, no, they did not talk about plan B or birth control. N: In high school, the teachers… No, we had like a life skills class and they never… I mean, they kind of touched on it but they didn’t they didn’t really go much detail into it or just there wasn’t really a lot of sex education available at my high school. N: So you just had to hear from people word of mouth and I didn’t really know what it was until probably junior of high school. N: In high school, they kind of were just like yeah keep waiting till marriage and I was just like I don’t really want to do that. I mean that is for some people but personally started to date some girls and gotten like serious relationships or something. N: That’s like you want to have sex or and you don’t know what to do. N: I was fortunate enough to have my parents and things like that, but a lot of kids aren’t and don’t know what they’re doing or have unprotected sex, unsafe sex. They were almost like ‘don’t make physical contact with a girl”, ‘Don’t kiss’, ‘Don’t do that’. They’re just like you’ll get diseases from doing anything physical really orally or just having sex. I was just… okay and then, in high school was I started dating and I’m just like… ‘Dad – am I allowed to kiss a girl’ or anything like that? He’s like yeah, and then he like gave me the talk and stuff and I was just like; ‘Oh so they were completely wrong what they taught me’ and he’s just like make sure you use a condom and everything like that. and that’s kind of the overall view of what I remember those a while ago. For me, it was not great. G: Because it was a Catholic school, we were taught abstinence-only. G: I don’t member what grade it started in, I do think they kind of brought it up from time to time but it wasn’t really discussed with us until, I believe, ninth grade, that’s kind of when I explicitly remember sex-ed being a thing and when they taught it. G: Like I said, it was absence only there was no discussion of birth control, no discussion of condoms or no there was but it was… how condoms weren’t as effective as people claimed they are, how you can still get S.T.Ds, how… you know like the consequences of like unintended pregnancy. There was no discussion of abortion unless it was, of course, how it will ruin your life but the thing that they talked about the most is how basically, regardless of like whether or not you’re like safe in terms of like using condoms, using birth control, anything like that, they talked a lot about how if you have sex outside of marriage, then basically like you lose the ability to properly bond with people every time you have sex with somebody. So basically they were saying the more you have sex with different people when you finally meet like the one you’re just a hollow husk of a person, it can’t bond the way that you used to and that you just… you won’t be able to have a good marriage. So there’s a lot of kind of fear in it and just no discussion of like, ‘If you do want to have sex, that’s how you can be safe’ or ‘If this happens to you, his is where you can go’ or anything like that. It was very much just like no you will not have sex outside of marriage and if you do, then your life will be ruined. What people say is that someone like the teacher really gives a cookie to a student and be like, take a bite out of that and then they will and then they’ll take it to another student and they’ll be like ‘Do you want to take it by to this’ and, of course, they’ll say no because, when I took it bite of it… and then they’ll be like ‘that’s what happens when you have sex.’ G: I do think something that happened once though at my school was; Someone took like a piece of tape and they put it on their skin and then they took it off and they’re like ‘and then try to put it on again’ and they’re like ‘See every time you have sex somebody see how the tape doesn’t stick as well’. That’s what happens when you have sex outside of marriage in terms of how you have relationships, you’ll just lose the ability to like have real relationships. I know one thing that happens a lot in schools if private or public is; In order to keep kids from having sex, they’ll show dumb pictures of S.T.Ds in the really far advanced stages. This actually happened at my high school; We were shown pictures of like the clap or what I think is syphilis and like the very yeah, so like scared a lot of scare tactics. We would literally look at pictures of like diseased genitalia. So I went to high school in, Ohio and so I went to a public school, I went to Lakota West and there we did have a more comprehensive sex and it still emphasized abstinence above everything else but they did say things like this is a condom, this is birth control, these are the different types of birth control, this is how you use a condom. So that was much better, but they also glossed over abortion where they were just like; also, abortion is a thing, not even that’s an option just like it’s a thing and then they like glossed over it. There was also nothing about how, if you are gay or if you’re a lesbian, how you can be safe. We did talk about consent, which was good we had some representatives from an Ohio based women’s shelter come in and talk about that but then we also had Representatives come in from some kind of like… I don’t even know what it was. This is two guys and they’re really nice, they said that men are protectors and women are treasures and that was a little weird a public school too! My parents had discussed it with me like very briefly. G: We kind of had a sex talk whatever but again it was just like; men and women do this from their adults and some day you will. G: Now it was pretty much like all the sex ed that I had. G: I was lucky and that like I did I was able to learn about it through other ways like through the internet and stuff, so that was cool but had I not had that as a resource, I probably wouldn’t… I probably wouldn’t know as much as I do now as an adult. So obviously I’m in the Midwest and these were just a few experiences but from all the people that I talked to about this topic, the vast majority of all stories I heard were very similar to those and the statistics confirm that too. So when sex ad is taught at all, 39 states require abstinence to be a part of it while only 20 states require birth control to be a part of it. According to data from the National Survey of family growth on teenagers aged 15 to 19 in the United States who have received some kind of formal sex education, only 60% of them have received education on birth control, about 80% of them have been told to say no to sex, so there’s some kind of overlap between the two groups but the number that actually shocks me, is that about 30% of them have been told to say no to sex and at the same time have not gotten any formal education on birth control. At the time of their first intercourse, only about half of them has received formal instruction on contraception and most shockingly because this isn’t only about contraception but also about protection from S.T.Ds, only about half of them has been taught how to use a condom. The numbers on instruction that those teenagers have received from parents are about the same or lower. So in the end 21 percent of females and 35% of males did not receive instruction on methods of birth control from either a formal source or a parent. Okay, that was a lot of numbers. But what actually counts is the outcome, right? Well according to research and I’ll put the links to several statistics on this in the infobox below, abstinence-only sex education is not effective when it comes to preventing unwanted teen pregnancy or the spread of STDs In fact, it seems to have no effect on the spread of S.T.Ds while it actually seems to raise the number of unwanted teen pregnancies. The United Nations has published statistics that say that in 2005 to 2010 out of 1,000 teenage women aged 15 to 19 there were 7.9 of them pregnant in Germany, while there were 41.2 pregnant in the United States, this includes pregnancies ending in live birth, abortion and pregnancy loss, while the abortion rate for teenage pregnancies is slightly higher in the United States. Regarding the spread of S.T.Ds among teenagers, I actually couldn’t find any comparable statistics for the 2 countries but if you find any feel free to link them in the comments below. Now to slowly wrap this up I’d like to say that I absolutely understand that many religious beliefs don’t comply with having sex before marriage and that’s absolutely justified but, in my personal opinion, there’s a difference between your personal beliefs and decisions on the one hand and receiving factual information on the other hand. I think that teenagers should know what S.T.Ds exist, how they can protect themselves from them and what they can do when they get them. They should also know what kinds of contraceptions exist how they function how they can get them and how a pregnancy works. None of that forces anyone to actually have sex and from my personal experience, knowing all of that doesn’t exactly make sex more tempting. It makes it clear to teenagers that sex isn’t just fun but also responsibility and, if you’re religious, it’s your decision whether you want to have sex before marriage or not, but if you do end up doing it, you should at least have the knowledge to do it in a safe way and act responsible, that’s my opinion. Of course abstinence is the only way to be 100% protected and that should be mentioned but abstinence-only while it can absolutely be part of a religion class in my opinion, it does not belong in a biology or a health class. I also find it interesting that, even though in Germany’s state and church are actually connected while in the U.S there is a separation of state and church, sex education in the U.S is heavily influenced by religious beliefs, and thereby mainly Christian beliefs, while, in Germany, religion doesn’t play a role in that at all. You’d kind of expect it to be the other way around but I’m actually pretty sure that, if a German teacher just decided to teach abstinence until marriage instead of comprehensive sex education, they would get in big trouble with the school and the parents. So obviously there are still a lot of topics that can be discussed regarding sex education in both countries, like gender roles, L.G.B.T.Q, the parents’ roles, etc, but that would be way too much for this video. So I hope this was informative for you guys and as I said I’d love to see a civilized discussion in the comments below and for all the statistics that I mentioned and for more related videos and articles check out the info box below and as always thank you guys so much for watching subscribe to my channel if you like what I’m doing, follow me on Instagram and I hope I’ll see you next time. [In German] Bye!

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100 Responses

  1. Joe Lammers says:

    Sex education in the United States is going to vary substantially depending on what state you're in, the school district you attend, and your particular teacher. One the unfortunate things in the U.S. is, that due to anti-gender-discrimination laws – it is illegal in this country for publicly-funded schools (the schools that 95+% of Americans attend) to teach different things to the boys and to the girls. They don't necessarily have to teach boys and girls in the same classroom at the same time – but boys and girls have to be taught everything about both sexes – or at least that what the law basically requires. In the U.S., all responsible parents understand that it's the parents' jobs to teach their children about sex in advance of the awkward government-scripted sex-ed classes. In my experience – EVERY single student in my sex-ed classes was aware of everything or nearly everything that was discussed before they made us go the class and take the sex quizzes

  2. airwky says:

    I dated a German girl once… COMPLETELY different than dating American women. Good, but different…

  3. Radim Cernej says:

    Very good video. You are a talented journalist, Felicia. Related fact: American adult women in their 20s/30s/40s rarely use contraception. Overall I have observed that white Americans have pretty poor love lives. On the other hand some black, Latino and Chinese/Korean Americans have exciting/satisfying intimate lives. As far as the origins of this state of affairs: My explanation is that United States was originally settled by crude farmers. Physically strong, sometimes intelligent, but uneducated and unsophisticated. Plus the British are also somewhat frigid. And once the culture was established, the new arrivals assimilated and adjusted. Same story with bread – so many German immigrants in US, yet no good bread.

  4. Niklas Molén says:

    Frightening how poor and religiously controlled education can be. But in defense of the abstinence argument, statistics show that the more sexual partners you had before marriage, the greater the likelihood of divorce.

  5. Samuel Rivas says:

    I think it has to do with money. Sex ed means you have to pay a teacher and have all parents sign off that they are ok with the teacher teaching it. Kids then have to sit for a few hours while we just wanted to play outside.

    Its cheaper and easier to say "Just dont have sex, now go play outside"

    I will say now that I'm a married adult I do see a correlation with being promiscuous and bad finances, depression/ suicidal thoughts, and overall personal responsibility.

    But I'm just a 29 year old boomer?‍♂️

  6. Donovan Quesenberry III says:

    You’ve handled the sex topic very well in this post. Germany handles sex education for youth better, more comprehensively than in the US. I think it would be awesome if sex education in the US was similar to that in Germany, but at out States level, not Federal. Your stats of 7.9% Germany vs. 41.2% US out of 1000 was shocking. There are other factors in the US that contributes to teen pregnancies including race, economics, and social programs that actually pay for or promote having babies at a young age. I don’t know if Germany has such factors, too.

    Your summary was very good. Religious beliefs vs factual information was a good point! Agree completely.

    Sehr gut gemacht, deutsches Mädchen. Es tut uns leid. Meine deutsche Schrift ist nicht sehr gut.


    Our family is German American, still considers itself German, and has lived in North America since the early 1600s. The US and German nations don’t have similar governments. Like, at all. Germany came into being through empire and the sword; for much of your history you were governed by the aristocracy and an emperor. Not you are a democracy. The US resulted from ideals. We aren’t a pure democracy and loathe the tyranny of the majority (well, some of us). For example, our religious rights aren’t derived from government and can’t be overruled by American courts. In theory at least. And we aren’t beholden to a European court on human rights. Government and Courts can’t grant rights to US citizens. We already have those rights. Courts can only remove rights from citizens.

    The phrase is “crossing a line”, not “crossing a border”.

    US separation of Church and State vs German was an interesting distinction. It’s a discussed topic in the US. I would prefer the German model of Church and State not separated.


  7. CaL 76 says:

    Vast majority of the differences between USA and Germany on sex is based off of religion and openness. The fact that prostitution is legal in Germany shows how open Germans are on sex.

  8. Pauly Mac says:

    Germany has this one right. Religion in this country is really about controlling the masses and keeping people dumb about real life, do what we say you are just a dumb sheep, we need to be more like Europe on this. Thanks.

  9. Joe Lammers says:

    If you're expecting and trusting school-teachers to teach your kids everything that they need to know about sex – you're a lousy parent. That's my opinion and it applies globally. I don't what language you speak or how good the schools are. I just couldn't imagine going through sex-education without already knowing what's going on. If you're expecting kids to figure that stuff out in a classroom with 30 other equally-uneducated kids – that's just bad parenting. I don't care what magazines they can get.

  10. william gosvener says:

    Okay in practice birth control is only 10% effective.

    As for stds go, on average condemns only provide protection 30% of time and can due damage to the male.

    The only known effective form of STD and pregnancy protection is abstanance.

    People who have had sex outside of marriage is 80% more likely to cheat on their partner. Well sex prior to marriage is a predictor of divorce.

    Plan B is linked to ovarian cancer.

    The only form of safe sex is not having sex.

  11. The Guy With a Y says:

    After having watched all your videos…. I now know why the West is dying. I also know why Europe is a hell hole.

    Funny how everyone comes over to America to tell us how to act…. while simultaneously wanting to be American. It's hilarious.

  12. KFStreich says:

    That must have been an ugly cookie. If it was a hot cookie everyone would be ready to take a bite.

  13. aakla says:

    Hawaii circa 1982 5th or 6th grade sex ed was taught in health class. I don't remember any permission slip they just taught it.

  14. fall22123 says:

    This is the thing that completely baffles me about Christian conservatives in the US. They don't want abortions. They also don't want to give kids the information to prevent unwanted pregnancy. It makes no sense.

  15. Joe Lammers says:

    For the record, at 9:00 when discussing the standardization of sex-ed curriculum, your facts aren't 100%. In order to receive $$$$ from the Federal gov't for education, every state has to submit curricula (plural-form of curriculum) to the U.S. Department of Education for review and approval/revisions. They must also have specific testing and statistical gathering procedures in place to ensure that students are actually learning the things they're supposed to be learning. There are also very specific national laws regarding things like – all the information has to be generally accepted by the scientific community, it must be factual and medically accurate. Somewhere – I'm trying to find it right now – there is about a 45 page handbook regarding the requirements of anatomic correctness, size, color, level of detail, etc. regarding all sexual content (pictures/drawings/sketches/artwork) and so, if the schools are all following all the laws, yes – it is in fact quite regulated and standardized. But, in the US, the states have nearly exclusive rights to decide how to do their own education systems and federal government just puts rules in place that say – do things this way or we will take your Federal funding away.

  16. Tina Nickerson says:

    Well done young woman!!

  17. Cory Carlson says:

    If we had decent teachers and the lessons stay away from political agendas then it might be better. Aka teaching 6 year olds about anal sex, and 7 year olds about how to be transgender and cross-dressing. But speaking from expirence our teachers (most) cant teach anything well. If you live in a high class neighborhood maybe you'll get average teachers. Most can't teach math.. (when my class got to college we were 2 years behind where we should have been.. all of us) they can't teach basic history or how govt works and the purpose of the 3 branches, they can't be fired even if their terrible, luckily there is usually a few teachers who go above and beyond for their students.. but having said that I wouldn't want to give them any more responsibility over what they have already. Most people learn 10x more from the internet vs anything we ever would have learned from our sex Ed classes.

  18. Jules says:

    In Florida when I was in school the girls and boys were separated in sixth grade for basic sex education about how our reproductive system worked and proper feminine hygiene. More in-depth sex education was offered in high school health class which was actually an elective at my high school. I was not allowed to date until I was 16 and I was not expected to remain a virgin until I got married. I was encouraged to date as many boys that I wanted but was told that if I slept with every boy I dated I would be a slut, If I had sex with someone when I didn’t love then I was just banging them to scratch an itch. I was expected to date them long enough to know that I loved them and be willing to have a child ( in case you got pregnant) with them before we “ made love” . My sister-in-law teaches fifth grade and overhears girls graphically describing getting “ laid “and needing a “booty call” and she can’t inform the parents that there 10 and 11-year-olds daughters are likely sexually active because that would be a slut shaming the girls who are mostly prepubescent . Girls at that age do not naturally think about sexuality and being sexual without society sexualizing them and teaching it to them. I work in retail and see heavily padded bras, thong underwear and high-heeled shoes marketed for girls as young as five and I’ve seen mothers buy it for their little girls. A few years back I saw a story on CNN where a poll found that 98% of American kids between the ages of 8 and 16 had seen hard-core porn and and “unnatural porn” on their cell phones. Apparently the new normal for our modern woke society is for 10-year-olds to have booty calls and watch porn on their cell phones.

  19. Mark Giltner says:

    Americans and I'm talking about the boomer's. Are generally prudes when it comes to discussing topics on sex.
    Europeans are more open about the topic.

  20. Darkflash says:

    Personally I happen to be conservative, and do believe abstinence is best. Obviously it is the only 100% sure way to avoid disease or pregnancy. That said, I also don't consider abstinence to be a reasonable expectation and choice for everyone. Germany, to me, sounds more sensible. Teach kids what's what, give them safe environments and trusted/informed adults they can come to with questions, remind them to never do anything they're not comfortable doing or with a person they're not comfortable with… And most importantly make sure kids have someplace they can go to get help if something "goes wrong" – Pregnancy, disease, whatever else… In that last case especially, its important to be sure "help" doesn't also include pushing "political agendas"/specific choices forced on kids by adults. Hopefully the US gets a grip eventually – The Victorian Era ended a long time ago. Thank you Felicia for sharing your insights and experiences from the German perspective.

  21. Samuel Roy says:

    Virgin guys watching this video be like ?

  22. John McCormick says:

    Some background information:

    1. The US is not a unitary country as Germany is. Each state is responsible for establishing education policy, so there is great variation in what is or is not taught.

    2. By custom, it is forbidden to teach human evolutionary biology outside of a few universities in the US. Lacking such, those who profess to teach "sex education" understand little and as a result introduce other misinformation, such as the anti-scientific assertion that humans possess the attribute "gender".

    3. Unlike much of the Protestant world where Liberal Protestant theology has vanquished conservative Protestant theology, these two factions are still battling in the US, and since the early 20th century , public schools are seen as a project of liberal Protestantism (Progressivism).

    In the end, it is the delusion that humans are something other than an animal species that leads to an inability to talk about human reproduction processes in zoological and biological clarity and factfulness.

  23. Shag Wellington says:

    You can't really compare Catholic schools to public schools because the approach is very different. Your interviews would have been more valid if the Americans you interviewed had all gone to public schools like most Americans do. It's much different in states like California or Oregon than in Tennessee, Kentucky, Mississippi etc.

  24. My May says:

    Fantastic video. Really lovely channel. Best wishes.

  25. tony rosano says:

    It differs depending on state

  26. Myrtonos says:

    This is the first time you are not the only person in your video, well done!

    Speaking of options parents have in Germany, you say that parents don't get to opt them out of sex education. But apparently, homeschooling is not a legally sanctioned alternative to taking children to a public school (not that independent schools are still public in this sense) in Germany. See:

    And any idea what sex education is like in Canada and if the problems with sex education in the U.S you describe may actually be an issue in North America generally?

  27. jeffpro18 says:

    Great Video! Very informative! I'm from The Northeast Part of The US and I never had the opportunity to take sex ed classes. So everything about sex I had to learn on my own through websites and health pan-flits from the doctors office, which took a long time for me to become knowledgeable in the same way as young people from Germany. I wish we had sex education mandatory across the country like in Germany, I think that would help get rid or have less of the stigma, ignorance and mis information, teen pregnancies and STI's.

    However, not everyone here would agree especially a lot of religious people.

  28. Chuck says:

    Hello Felicia:
    I think it is Great the way you can talk about any subject, You done that like a real professional. I'm from the Northeast US but was raised in the country and there was no such thing as sex education, I had to learn from trial & error. While I was never taught it was something dirty no one in my family ever mentioned sex. I think I believed in the stork until I was about 20.? I'm surprised since my ancestors were European. Guess they changed their ways when they came over here. I enjoyed your video as always and I also enjoy hearing your view on things. Thanks for sharing.

  29. Dr. Lipschitz says:

    The US has nearly 350 million people. It is very difficult to get everyone to agree to educational decisions that that are all encompassing the wants and needs vary so much state to state county to county town to town. That’s why these types of decisions are typically made locally or at the state level.

  30. John Minogue says:

    This issue is much more fundamental than sex ed. In Germany, there is no pretense. The government is in charge and takes precedence over the parental rights. About ten years ago, a family fled to the US from Germany because they were very religious and they wanted to homeschool their kids. The parents faced loss of custody, prosecution, fines, and even imprisonment, and germany fought their immigration to the US for five years. They wanted them extradited back like criminals. Eventually the German government let them go, but it was an eye opener. Americans are not willing to cede that much power to the state. Having said all that I agree with mandatory sex education but it should be taught as part of the biology class. Abstinence has no place in a biology class.

  31. Charlie Cross says:

    Abstinence only "sex education" is not sex education it is anti sex propaganda to teach children to fear sex

  32. Tom Peled says:

    I don't remember when I didn't have erections. I had them, they were uncomfortable, but I didn't think much. I learned what it was called on the internet.

  33. Pope Anthony says:

    Why there is such HUGE differences between the US and europe on sex, sexuality, and sex ed:
    1.) The US was originally settled by deeply religious and susperstitious people. That mindset is still found in certain parts of the US.
    2.) The US Constitution guarantees to the states powers not given to the federal government in the constitution. However, starting with the administration of Franklin Roosevelt the federal government has tried harder and harder to be a nanny state. While some states have endeavoured to be "progressive", that ends up translating to control-which is counter productive.
    3.) The landmark Roe v. Wade supreme court decision on abortion has been probably the most divisive case decided by that court. The justification for the supremes to decide the case was article 7 section 22 of the constitution which gives the federal government the right to regulate interstate business. Since Roe v. Wade involved only one building not connected in any way to another building/business it was a stretch of the court to decide the case. This case has actually not only set back common sense relations in our society, but also the ability for certain areas to actually be standard bearers of great ideas.
    4.) Because sex is still regarded as nasty and disgusting and so is most nudity, our laws, mores, and standards give kids conflicting ideas on sex and nudity and this cripples the US.

  34. German Girl in America says:

    I am aware that this is a very sensitive topic but it is one that has been on my mind for a while and I'm glad that I finally got to finish a video on this and share it with you guys! I am sharing my personal view on this topic in this video. You do not have to agree with me and are welcome to share your arguments and opinions in the comments as long as you stay objective and don't insult anyone. Thank you guys for watching and for your support! 🙂

  35. IsThisTheKrustyKrab? says:

    You are so gorgeous.

  36. Jeffery Parks says:

    Nicely done. I feel that the United States should adopt the same type philosophy concerning sex education and the same laws as Germany. I have always felt that America needed to be more open and "adult" about educating our kids so that they can make the most informed decision about sex and about when then make that decision when the time is right for them. Good job!

  37. J W says:

    Great video – one of your best!

  38. Greg Zambrano says:


  39. Little Bob says:

    In US sex ed varies not only state to state but town to town. My sex ed (north NJ public school) n late 60s early 70s was much like the German National standard of the mid 90s. All the details presented correctly. Private school kids were just taught abstinence. No standard texts were available. I had sex ed at age 11, 12. 15, and 18 in class for 3 hrs each week all year long.

  40. Connor C says:

    I think each state has different sex education laws. In Connecticut I had to take it from 5th grade through 12th grade. It’s called health class

  41. Don Diego says:

    Here in the states , over the last few decades we haven't been teaching kids to be smart about anything so why would sex education be any different? To me it is just another way we are failing the next generation.

  42. Trifler500 says:

    It's not like married people don't need birth control. lol

  43. Trifler500 says:

    I completely agree with you. I think if the U.S. government was able to simply force all states to teach comprehensive sex education, within two generations pretty much all opposition would cease. Unfortunately, such a law can't be passed without agreement first, rather than later.

    The U.S. government is designed to emphasize allowing states to set their own laws as much as possible, with Federal laws, when they exist, mostly serving as the lowest common standard. States can then set a higher standard if they wish. Unfortunately, this has the side effect of making uniform standards impossible for most topics.

  44. meteomage says:

    I am a Christian and I believe that sex should wait until after marriage. That being said, the fear-instilling abstinence only teaching obviously does not work very well. I also don't agree with the casual way of teaching that sex is a part of life, you can do whatever you want with your body, and here are ways to "protect yourself". Someone at my church said it best – "There is no such thing as safe sex before marriage, because it's more than just physical. It is an emotional and spiritual act – you can't protect from those aspects, and you will never forget your first time." I think it should be taught that your virginity is something very sacred and not to give it away lightly. Movies and media definitely do not help in the way they portray sex.

  45. joanne smith says:

    I get soooo tired of repeating this, but…………as with many (most) issues, it depends on the state! All of the people you interviewed are from the South. You are in the Midwest. It wasn't that long ago that women in Ohio couldn't even get prescription contraceptives without the consent of their husbands. Those are the most conservative areas of the USA. Other areas of the USA, like where I live, do have sex ed in Health class. There isn't a dedicated class called Sex Education, it's part of the Health curriculum. As far as parents' consent for this is concerned, in my area parents must opt out – not in, meaning that, unless the parent specifically objects, the child will have comprehensive sex education. Abstinence is part of that education but not to the detriment of education about other forms of pregnancy and disease prevention, safety, and general health including issues of contraception, healthy relationships, and consent.

    And yes, no matter what some try to tell you about how religion doesn't come into the reasons whey some states have fact-based sex education and some don't, don't believe it. Many state legislatures are heavily swayed by religious groups, the overall strength of that influence varies by region and state. All the people you spoke with are from those more religiously governed areas of the country.

  46. Kasey Woody says:

    Private Schools and Public Schools are completely different. I attended public schools all of my life in North Carolina and they didn't shy away from any topics (minus abortion). It was classified under the term "health class" and it began in the 6th grade. In the 9th grade we went more in-depth into these topics and they gave us condoms. We were also told we could receive free condoms at the local health clinic but I don't know anyone that didn't just go buy them in the store. The only subject that was shunned upon was abortion. Basically, the viewpoint (and this is the South) was/is we taught you that if you are to have sex and do not want to get pregnant use protection. If you need to have an abortion then you failed to follow the advice we gave. Don't take your actions out on the child and thus, own up to your mistakes. In summary, actions have consequences. Not saying this is correct just sharing my experiences of how the school system I went to dealt with this issue/topic.

  47. Tanzra says:

    The US is a very diverse place. It would have been good to hear some people who got comprehensive sex education in your video to hear all sides of the story.

  48. Jan Metus says:

    "Very sensitive topic…" Yeah but still modern day hypersupersensitivity has only hypersupernegative reactions from me. It's just too much for an "old schooler" to handle… :/ Anyway, good topics, especially the more serious ones…

  49. C. E. Newton says:

    I have no idea what these folks are talking about. I'm 49, and when I was in school over 30 years ago, even in VERY conservative Kentucky and in an even MORE conservative county south of Louisville, we had mandatory sex-ed classes in 8th and 9th grade. It was never assumed this was the ONLY sex-ed we received, as the vast majority of us were told about "the birds & the bees" at home by a parent. Sorry to tell you, but it would seem your American freinds are either mistaken, or are falsely reporting this experience. I"m a Gen X'er. They told us what it was all about. Perhaps my fellow peers have chosen not to but I seriously doubt it. If anything, now days, they're going way beyond and talking about LGBTQ+. The young lady was describing what would be taught in a parochial school almost certainly, not a public one.

  50. C. E. Newton says:

    "I never had a boyfriend stay over." OMG the horror! SMH

  51. Keith Soderlund says:

    I'm old. I had a very dear friend from Germany. His name was Axel Wilhelm. He went by Charlie. We had lots of similar interests. I was a photographer and he raced cars. I have lots of picts of him. He always had a German flag on his car. He eventually had to go back to Germany. He came back to visit and I let him stay at my house as we were on holiday. Since we lost contact. I really wish I could see him agin. He made his own beer. He said dont drink the bottom of the bottle. I have two pictures of him in his race car. Signed and numbered two. I have one and he has one. He taught me alot about Germany and I really enjoyed his friendship. Sorry for being off topic for your video.
    Your a real sweetheart and am sure your parents are Really proud of you. Love your videos and always behave. Life is a gift.
    Keith from MN, USA

  52. Michael Rice says:

    America is more religious than Europe in general, though that varies widely by state and how urban or rural the state is. Like American politics in general, the South and rural areas tend to be more regressive, while the coasts tend to be more progressive. The Midwest and mountain states can can go either way, though don't generally trend towards for extremes. The South and Appalachia are called the Bible Belt for a reason.

  53. J.W. Zagst says:

    I just recently found your channel, but I love your videos so much! And your English is amazing! My family is from Baden-Württemberg, but we've been in the US for several generations. I am the fifth generation born in America, descended from John Zagst who came over in 1851. John had two brothers, one who stayed in Germany and one who had come to America several years earlier in 1847. There are three branches of the family from those three brothers — two in America and one still in Germany. In my branch, I am Jeffrey (5th Gen), Son of William (4th Gen), who is Son of Joseph (3rd Gen), who is Son of Alloysius (2nd Gen), who is Son of Bernard (1st Generation born in America), who is Son of John. At some point I want to learn German because I feel an obligation to and want to speak the language of my family. Anyway, that was a long story you didn't ask for, but got anyway, haha. Love your videos and will continue watching them.

  54. letter203ify says:

    The subject of sex is a moral topic and has different approaches according to which worldview one adopts. Different worldviews should be taught objectively so that the individual can determine for themselves what is right for them.

  55. trash hauler says:

    TheFact that you have to put a disclaimer at the beginning of your video that you don’t mean to offend anybody says everything about today’s society

  56. trash hauler says:

    Just an FYI there are two genders male and female science says so

  57. Joze Te Raay says:

    In the Nederlands we are way more open of sex . We learn about all the aspect of sex . also we learn about the lgtb way more then germany and the Dutch parents are verry open about sex. Dutch teenagers can get easily protection like birthcontrol . At the age of 16 without consent of the parents and in some cases at the age of 14. We talk to our Friends about sex and also to our parents. I'am glad i had a good sex aducation. It helpts à lot in becomming à women .

  58. James Horn says:

    I thinl Germa attitudes tward sex may have changed substantially due to WW I and WW II, Especially after WW I, there was a huge disparity in numbers of men and women of child=bearing age with large numbers of disabled soldiers as well as large number of dead.  This also affected the other countries which had been involved in the whole war, whereas the US was only in the actual fighting for about 6 months. The 1920s are referred to as the Roaring Twenties here because of a wide spread breakdown of traditional attitudes among those who experienced heavy combat and there were comparble issues in Europe  (I think this happens after many major wars, and there is a return to tradition a decade or so later.  After the Civil War, the wildness was exported to the Wild West,but toward the end of the 19th century, the "reformers;" gained control and Federal laws such as the Comstock law were passed which still affect a lot of our laws.  In Europe the shock of the two World Wars had something of a permanent affect, so that, as you say, you have state churches, but they have little influence because they are more or less dying.

  59. James Horn says:

    1. You did not mention if yoor schooling included the legal issues of sex. In the US, the various states have set different ages of consnet, so that even if a girl says yes, it does not matter if she is under age. In some states there is a recognitin of couples clse in age forming and one member having a birthday and"Rsuddnly sex becoming illegal.  Other states just have a flat age with no exemptions.  In the 19th century the age of consent for marriage was a uniform 14, but in the 20th century it got raised and oddly, the most religious states tend too have lower ages of consent (15 and 17) while the "liberal"states tend to have it at 18.  Of course, the excuse is protection from adult predators, but some laws are very strict and can affect younger victims.  Sextin has added a whole new set of issues with teens sometimes charged by overzealous prosecutors with producing child pornograpy.  I don't think many schools teacht the legalities or emphasize the need to be aware of the laws of other states if you are away at colllege, mve to another state, or are just on vacation.
    2.  I grew up in the 60s in a rural area.  (part of our problem is that for the most part, schools are run by locally elected officials who are not shy about skirting state laws they disagree with)  Sex ed, such as it was, was part of a general Health class which was generally taught by a Phys Ed teacher.  In my case, even as an 8th grader, I did not have much respect for the intellectual abilities of my teacher.  One girl asked if it was possible to identify the gender of the skeleton in the corner.  He did not know.  From my reading inarchaeology, I knew it was possible if they had the pelvis and gt laughed at. 
    3.  Beware of this also.  I knew all about the biology of sex.  I read my mother's textbook on obstetrics from her nursing school.  I knew all about delivering babies.  I just could not get a date.  My impression was that the pssibility of pregnancy caused such problems that any sane girl would have to be deeply in love even to risk it.  Hence I think I put so much pressure on myself to please that I never enjoyed a date.  (remember ,  too, that this was only a few years after the pill came out and it was almost an experimental thing.  Birth control meant condoms.)

  60. Fauler Perfektionist says:

    "They said that men are protectors and women are treasures."
    Oog make wheel! Oog light fire! Oog protect woman! Tunga!
    <beats chest in dominant display>

  61. Living Member says:

    I think you could compete with siri or Alexa lol

  62. Baccatube79 says:

    So funny. When I went to school (Gymnasium) in Bavaria in the 1990s, even then the teachers implicitly stated that everybody has a sex drive, that IT is going to happen, and that you best be prepared by using protection and birth control, also they did adress the boys in class that contraception is not exclusively the girl's responsibility. Also HIV was a huge issue then, but unfortunately for me as a gay boy, homosexuality just didn't happen in class. I guess (hope) that has changed a lot since. I got my information on what it means to be gay and have gay sex from a) the Bravo magazine and b) the guys I experimented with who were older than I was. What I really missed was a climate where also gay boys could fall in love with each other and maybe make out on the schoolyard as my classmates and esses did or hold hands or just be together. I also have the impression that the climate has changed on that topic.
    For the US I hope that their society can shift from that hypocritical "abstinence is a thing" approach because it simply is not. Teenagers are in the blossom of sex hormone production, their bodies (both male and female) are ready to have sex and they will try it one way or the other. It is better to tell them how they can enjoy intimacy and physical contact without risk than heap guilt and fear on them and then send them off to run into a potentially dangerous situation.

  63. imad kaddour says:

    I like your channel and admire you more

  64. letter203ify says:

    Another view is that God created man and woman from the man, and He instituted marriage to join the two for reasons that include procreation. Sex is meant for the marriage bed and in this way is a sacred and special thing between the partners. Civilization did flourish for many years and we are here today. This biblical view is not presented in secular education on grounds of separation of church and state, but perhaps all worldviews should be presented and let the individual decide what is right for themselves.

  65. MT says:

    Felicia what type of career are you pursuing here in the states ?

  66. Shawn Parnell says:

    Sex education in Indiana during the late 80s early 90s was a joke! They definitely spent more time on the Just Say No campaign

  67. Scott Joseph says:

    Here's a fun point: Germany is DYING. Your birth rate is about 1.3 children per woman, your median female age is in the 40s. Within 30 years, DEMOGRAPHICALLY, your society is going to crash.

    Encouraging graduating from high school and getting married before sex results in a healthier society where it is more financially viable to have replacement birth levels.

    We also attract immigrants who want to work, assimilate into American culture, and have AMERICAN kids. Our LEGAL immigrants have low crime levels. The ones you can attract to YOUR moribund society have no interest in becoming German culturally, or supporting your social welfare system.

    Contemplate that as you watch Germany die before you hit sixty, madam.

  68. Brian Paq-Sav says:

    Sadly teaching abstinence only and not giving info about what sex is and how it works makes both boys and girls easier prey for sexual predators. They don't know what's happening until it's too late.
    Not that sex ed will completely protect them from the predators but it can help them be able to recognize they and seek to get away or get help.

  69. GamingWithStrats says:

    Awesome vid ??

  70. Norwegian Blue says:

    It seems the German contraception education has worked very well. Fertility rate in Germany is 1.5 child per woman. 2.1 is replacement level.

  71. eru san says:

    The American schools did a much better job.

    You can scoff, but even a single sexual partner before marriage greatly increases a woman's chances of unhappiness and divorce. And yes, people want to marry virgins, so the apple analogy works.

    And yes, we believe in a moral society, so sex outside of marriage is bad.

    Also, keep in mind that not every American school is the same. We're a huge country where small towns right next to each other will teach completely different things. So there isn't really an "American" version of sex ed. Plenty of places here do the same garbage Germany does.

  72. fjgalt says:

    Until the 20th century, most people grew up on farms. At that time, toddlers could see the barnyard animals having sex and grew up with an understanding of the mechanics and result of sex. It is only in modern times that sex has become a mystery.

  73. James Kirchner says:

    You would think the kids in this video received their sex education circa 1970 before the resurgence of incurable STDs. Since sexual morals loosened in the late 1960s, the rate of incurable sexually transmitted infections has also vastly increased, and condoms aren't fully reliable in preventing them. They talk kind of snarkily about abstinence education, but (depending on which study you read), it actually has made a difference in many parts of the US, and also in some Third World countries that saw abstinence education reduce their rates of AIDs infection.

    And nobody in the video explained well why it's a good idea for teenage children to have uncommitted sex.

    By the way, the reason religion plays so little part in sex education in Germany is probably that religion more or less doesn't exist in Germany anymore.

  74. Mark McCann says:

    Even though they may not be enforced rigorously, the "Age of Consent" laws in the USA in each state could be a factor. In California it is illegal to have sex with anyone under 18, and an 18 yr old could be charged with statutary rape having consensual sex with a 17 yr old. It's also "possible" that two 17 yr olds could be prosecuted for satutorliy raping each other. Other states have "Romeo and Julliet" laws where two people close to the same won't be prosecuted. See: https://www.ageofconsent.net/states

  75. Robert Mehe'ula says:

    I went to Catholic school. I think we talked about sex ed for like 2 hours. I assume my school wanted the parents to talk about the Birds and the Bees at home.

  76. Georgian Crossroads says:

    Actually sex education in the US has gone through various phases. Sometimes more informative. Sometimes too informative. Sometime uninformative. If you look at statistics you'll see that there have been various waves of teen pregnancies and extreme youth promiscuity (under 12 years old) after these periods the sex ed tightens up. It is perceived that the sex ed is responsible for teaching the students too much. Right now we are in the fall out over the early 2000's crisis.

    Knowing Europe pretty well I wouldn't hold up the German model too high. It's not the kind of thing that will work in the US. Federal control over sex education isn't going to work here. It's not just religion, it's also the autonomy of the states. I know quite a few younger folks now grown up in a stricter environment. Generally they seem to be doing fine having waited and being taught to wait. Sex ed tends to be seen, and maybe rightly so, as propaganda and not very neutral. So if the government controls it, then who is controlling the teaching of the government?

  77. Сергей Шевцов says:

    Hello from Russia sweetheart…

  78. Philo16 61 says:

    I was raised Catholic and back in the 70s when I was in grade school (6th grade?) there was one and I mean ONE time when the priest separated the boys and the girls. The boys and a Priest (you might wonder what a priest knows about sex…not much) went to a class room where we basically had "the talk" We discussed  several different topics, for some reason I focused on only one of the talking points "wet dreams"….uh yeah. We really should have talked more about this subject. The girls went with a nun (once again what does a nun know about sex? We were never told what the girls talked about and they seemed pretty tight lipped about the subject when it was all over. And THAT was the only time that sex was ever brought up in grade school. Highschool wasn't much better. So I was pretty clueless for a long time and I do believe it cause some issues for me later in life. PARENTS…EDUCATE YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX !

  79. Andrew Waits says:

    I always enjoy your video. I hope you will continue making them. Yes this is a controversial topic and I am not trying to start an argument. I am very happy that you admitted to and respected religious beliefs. I think it depends on what worldview you come from. Christians have done a bad job of explaining their position in the past. It should be stated that the Bible doesn't teach against sex but rather sex outside of marriage. It actually speaks positively of it when done in its proper context. I understand if people have different beliefs. However I wish that those who disagree would be more respectful of each others views.

    I will agree that better health and sexual education needs to be taught in America. However no one wants to address the pornography epidemic and the ills it brings upon our society. I think we can all agree on this: Sex is a beautiful thing but also a very dangerous thing. When used improperly, it can bring lasting damage to a persons life, family, and marriage. There much be boundaries. We are free to disagree as to what those might be i guess. I appreciate your opinion and hope that you wont shy away from hot topics like this in the future. They help us grow and better one another.

  80. phies says:

    agrree…. we received even in the 80s our sexed in school + of course bravo… and i remember vividly …. girlfriend wanted to spend first night over… both of us got condoms beforehand … and my mother (raised catholic) … came into my room … dropped some condoms on my table with the words "i am too young to be a grandmother!" and "have fun" … of course we were both so horrified that that nothing really happened that night … 😉

  81. Inge Haha says:

    This topic takes me back to California in 1996. There was a 50 or 60 year old lady curious if the au pair of a family 'did it' when she met her boyfriend. She was so stiff, needed 5 minutes to ask the question. I answered very German, being surprised how prude this married woman with two children was acting. I said, well, they are in love, they want to get married, they are both healthy. What else would they do, of course they have Sex. I told the au pair and we laughed forever. We laughed even more when she told me that his American friends asked them about their love life. They told them she wanted to stay a virgin till they were married.
    On the door of my Californian school was a huge poster. Ways to say no…. I am hungry is one of them. But eating instead of saying no does only cause obese people…

  82. LNGRLD. says:

    There is NO SUCH THING as "safe sex" I say this as a South African where we have the highest percentage of HIV infected. Abstinence should be the priority and then condoms etc. STDs are becoming more and more common in Germany because of the multiple partner culture (or lack thereof). Furthermore, having sex with someone whom you are not inlove with can lead to depression, anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. Feel free to object to what I have said but I am just telling you from what I have experienced here in South Africa and Germany.

  83. Kayinfso Here says:

    Excellent….but abstinence is in fact the best way to avoid sexual related problems, but I agree with German Girl that massive improvement in the US is needed.

  84. NotJo says:

    There should be a class for men to take on women's psychology and behavior. That will show men to stop irresponsibly having premarital sex with anyone.

    If you are a man reading my post, go MGTOW. You won't regret it. Women are crazy, not a mystery.

  85. Alejandro Galindo says:

    ??? I got two teenage girls, I don't know if they want their Dad to tell them about it..

  86. Jos Burd says:

    Love All your videos

  87. Resellers Domain says:

    I live in Boston area. I had no idea that others parts of USA had this experience. I graduated in the 90's and my sex ed was very similar to your experience in Germany. It was never mentioned by the school to be married before having sex or anything along those lines. I actually feel our sex ed was very thorough. My boys are in 5th and 8th grade and started sex Ed in 4th grade. They had to learn about menstrual cycles as well. There is an option to opt-out of sex Ed but that is not common. I've actually never heard of anyone being "opted-out". So strange that we have full on sex ed from 4th grade until 12th but there are other areas that handle it so differently. Hearing these Americans give their experiences is so strange-and I did 4 years in catholic school as well.

  88. Landon Y says:

    In Texas, we had Sex E.D. but it was mostly learning about all the STDs that you can get and how if you don't want STDs you just shouldn't have sex. We also were shown pictures of Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Blue Waffle, and AIDS on both men and women. It was horrifying. But let's be honest, the number one way to not get STDs and pregnant is by being abstinent. It's unrealistic in this day and age, but it's foolproof. I always planned on waiting until I was married, but then I learned that I was gay and then sex after marriage was essentially no longer an option :/

  89. Mahmoud Mohammad says:

    Wish to see u in real life cuz I’m in Dayton ?

  90. eric sam says:

    i enjoyed the video. But, I think you need to elaborate more on your opinion abd show facts. I dont mean to insult, but you sound like EVERY Liberal discussing their feelings.
    I admit, this is a though subject to perfect. There is NO correct way to handle the matter. What one person does with the knowlegde/wealth you give them, maybe totally diferent from someone else. That is Free-Will. So yes, Education is important.
    I was raised in a Christian home (Non-Demoninational). I have attend public schools from K-12th grade. I received sex education on three occasions. Once in 5th grade, in California (LA). The other times were in Arizona. Once in 6th grade, the other was in 9th grade (High School).
    For 5th grade, we had a male and female teacher discuss the subject and answered our questions.
    For 6th grade, The separated the boys and girls. Boys had a male teacher, while girls had a female teacher.
    Both 5th & 6th grade sessions required parents permission and were a week long.
    Finally, 9th grade was a week long in Health class. No parent permission required.
    In my opinion, parents should teach there kids, when they start asking questions. Similar to the movie, Kindergarten Cop. "Boys have a penis, Girls have a vagina"…The kids learned that from somewhere. I learned that from pornographic material that I had seen, way BEFORE 5th grade. My mom never had the sex talk with when I was a kid. She was too religious. Sex was forbidden. It wasn't until 10th grade that my mom and aunt had a talk with me. And that was more about finding the right person for marriage.
    At the time of my youth (Elementary School, K-6th), my dad wasn't really around. He was too busy working or in an alcoholic haze.
    So, like most people…Friends are a big influence.
    In regards to Christianity, there is no arguing. Sex before marriage is not a good idea. There is no justification of it being okay. Christians who believe that have not read their BIBLE. They have created their own god. Based on their own thought & beliefs. Hence, a god in their image…
    There is some truth about sex with multiple partners. People do became emotionally desensitized. How else can you explain ALL the broken/extended families that we have. Why so many women are on their third baby daddy, and have never been married. You would think that at some point Common Sense would kick in…lol. You would hope that at some point, a child would say/think…I want something different. I Do Not want the same difficulties that my parents went through. But, there they are…kids following their parents example.
    Democrats dont mind. It keeps people dependant on government. And when the kid grows up, another vote for the Democratic Party. Because people dont know any better.
    All you can do is teach your kids…WHAT YOU KNOW. And then, if you are religious…HOPE & PRAY that they make the BEST decision with the knowledge given to them. There is no Right or Wrong way. People are NOT Perfect. If we were, we would not have needed JESUS Christ to die for our sins…If you believe…
    Anyways, thanks for the video. Keep up the good work.

  91. David Siebert says:

    While I believe we ought to have well rounded sex education in US public schools, it ought to be age appropriate, devoid of indoctrination biases from all sides.

    Example: I'm in my early 40's, I grewup in rural/suburban South Jersey. Abstinence wasn't taught AT ALL, closest it came was wait till you're ready. Abortions weren't taught but for the feminists propaganda of "it's a female's right & males have ZERO say in the matter despite the baby being genetically 50% the male's.

    Also the latest trend of pathetic virtue signaling their level of "wokeness" in certain states or school districts in a disgusting & disturbing game of one upmanship by introducing younger & younger children to fringe fetishes where safety practices & informed risk takes a backseat to no judgment normalization. We now have 9-11 year olds being not just about but how to & encouraged to have anal sex. S&M & choking are in some cases taught rather than discouraged.

    For those reasons as well as numerous others, No Government has the right to supersede parental consent without due process of law & proving abuse or neglect.

    A side note: the inclusion of people who attend religious schools, which adheres to the canon laws & morality of the church are non comparables therefore bad examples.

  92. DaGeezman says:

    I totally agree with Germany's approach to this. Hiding your head in the sand and pretending it doesn't exist is never a good option. I believe that educating people and giving them the knowledge to make their own, informed decisions is the only sensible approach. Unfortunately, we have a very strong religious element in this country that prevents this. It is slowly changing however, and I do believe that eventually the US will be more like Germany (and most of Europe) in this regard.

  93. Jerome Mc Kenna says:

    I went to high school in the 1960's, it was a Catholic high school. Our sex education was somewhat limited but more by the culture of the era than by religion. We were taught about condoms. The assumption was the teenagers will at some point have sex. Being that it was a Catholic school, abstinence was preferred but we weren't given inaccurate information. Let me add that this was before a major Catholic encyclical on birth control. The priests who were teaching us assumed that the church would accept birth control. I never heard anyone discuss the encyclical after it came out. I think many in the US were disappointed.

  94. Dave Reisner says:

    I'm going to re-write my comment as it did not convey what I wanted it to. Again, thanks Feli for doing this video and sharing what it's like in Germany on this topic! Very informative!

    My opinion of the results of Germany's approach to sex education:

    1. Teenagers are encouraged to have sex. If you talk about it in 3 different grades in school and show pictures of naked people along with it, you will arouse curiosity naturally in boys and girls and thereby indirectly encourage it.
    2. Lack of scientific facts taught. They are called fear tactics in this video, but many of those including the extreme cases have actually happened to people and can happen to anyone engaging in sex. If you are going to do a facts only approach, you can't be selective of which facts you teach.
    3. Relationships are not structured. Anything goes or doesn't go in German relationships. This makes it a lot easier to have sex be a big part of the culture. Multiple partners in a culture of structured relationships like in the US doesn't work very well. Which married spouse wants to hear that their new spouse has been with 27 different people? Not a deal breaker, but also not a highlight of the marriage. (Feli covered this in another video)
    4. Abortion rate is basically the same as in the US even though Germany is a smaller country. (Feli said the US is only slightly higher in this video)
    5. No babies, not enough Getman babies to replace the current and next retirement groups in Germany. Babies are an obstacle to free and open sex and I think we all agree that Germany has overcome this obstacle.

    For these reasons I think the US in general would be hesitant to adopt Germany's approach to sex education.

  95. TrangleC says:

    I wrote a comment here about probably having had "S-ed" in school, but not remembering it at all and it got automatically deleted by Youtube 2 times. I have no idea why. There was nothing political or controversial in that comment and no "bad words" as far as I can tell.

  96. knick007 says:

    Some states in America still don’t properly educate people which is just insane. Schools shouldn’t be governed by religion. It should be a country wide thing to make girls know they can go to a clinic and get the pill, and guys to know well there is no shame in buying condoms.

  97. Matthew Walz says:

    "Can I get pregnant from kissing."….I feel like that question might have actually been different and perhaps you didn't want to be so explicit lol

  98. Jeffrey Root says:

    I am a dinosaur, being born in 1968 and went to school through the seventies and eighties. I saw the debates and cultural conflict unfolding in the news , though as a child and youth I had no comprehension. There was no real sex ed throughout my primary and secondary schools. The Health Classes that passed for it were merely reproductive biology with some STD scare tactics. I never knew anything about condoms or other forms of prophylactic measures . I learned by experience as a college student. I agree that this factual and practical education needs to be taught , at least when puberty is near at hand!

  99. DreamingRealist says:

    I am totally with you. Also in my opinion it is important to teach about birth conrol, health savety, etc.. I totally understand the religios concerns because a lot of americans are way more relgios than germans. However, also in marriage it´s good to know about birth control, etc. It´s fine to mention abstinence as savest way or to discuss in religion class but I think it´s important to teach knowlegde of how your body works.

  100. Trey Hocker says:

    One thing that I didn't know till I was about 30, is that women can only become pregnant for 5 days or so in a month. I thought women could get pregnant at any time, and was paranoid every time I had sex. Now, that doesn't mean that the other days, I would have not worn protection.. because I would have. Mainly, because I've had health issues all my life, and did not want to get disease I could easily prevent.

    I'm incredibly picky and over-cautious on alot of things, and sex and alot of partners is one of those things. I do believe it is correct that if you have alot of partners, it is harder to bond with your partner that'd you'd wanna be with for your lifetime. Better to have less partners, and make it special with that one person, looking back in hind-sight as a 45 year old.

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